In transition

I'm now turning this from a school project into a regular blog, which means I may or may not use the three-post format. Also, it's going to be a lot more relaxed now that I don't have to include the elements of the project. Enjoy!

Free Choice/Fantasy: Rage Of Lions 3

Wow. Just wow. Oh. My. Goodness.

TRENT????????? NO NO NO!!!!!!!!!

When did THIS happen? I mean, they loved each other! And now he wants to go out and kill Drew?
Hang on.
Maybe... he STILL THINKS DREW KILLED HIS MOTHER.
Oh, no.
Mark Ferran was told by the Duke after he joined the army that Drew actually tried to defend his mother. But no one ever went and tracked Trent down to tell him!
Oh boy. This could be interesting. I mean, obviously, Trent can't succeed, since there are more books for Drew to live through. But maybe he'll accidentally kill Hector or Whitley, even Gretchen, in and attempt to get to Drew.
I really hope Drew gets a chance to explain what happened to Trent before any of that happens. But Whitley dying would actually make sense plot-wise. It would create some nice tension, with the confused romantic situation between Drew and Whitley and Gretchen. Maybe Drew is still mourning Whitley, and Gretchen makes her move and he rejects her? There are all kinds of possibilities in that direction, although I'd be sad to lose Whitley. She's a great guiding influence so far for Drew.
Maybe Trent winds up joining the rebels? But then someone might come to kill them both, Drew because everyone seems to want him dead lately, and Trent for betraying the Catlords of Bast. And what the heck is happening to Hector? I have to think that black mark on his hand is nothing good, and a huge foreshadow of darkness taking him over as Vincent whispers in his ear.

Free Choice/Fantasy: Rage Of Lions 2

Oh, snap. I cannot bring myself to believe that in this seemingly hostile city, the soldiers forcing the Greencloaks to walk through the city unarmed by sending their weapons ahead of them is anything but a trick. Good thing they don't know Drew is among the scouts, or things would really get bloody. I don't trust these Horselords at all. If I were Broghan and the Greencloaks, I'd be running out of there as fast as possible- I could tell as soon as they started talking that they were slimy and stubborn, if not already turned traitor.
I'm wondering, though, if Larimer is really a bad person, or merely weak, or even doing what Bergan did during Leopold's reign and trying to protect the innocent people of the Longridings, caught up in someone else's fight. Bergan strikes me as simply choosing a quieter, less open kind of rebellion, though. If the Longridings secedes, they're going to bring down war on their heads from someone, whether it's Drew, Bergan, or somebody else altogether- especially if Leopold should happen to regain the throne.
Viscount Colt actually feels like more of the villain here, telling Larimer what to do and say, who to listen to. The very picture of a sleazeball adviser, manipulating the entire country to his own ends through one guy who put his trust in the wrong place.
Come to think of it, this is reminding me strongly of the scene from Lord Of The Rings, where another king of a people of horseback riders is led to ruin and disaster by a corrupt adviser listening to the devil on his shoulder.

Free Choice/Fantasy: Rage Of Lions 1

All right. So I already read the first chapter preview, and speculated a little on it in my last post. I'm really chomping at the bit to get at this one. I can't wait to find out if they manage to kill Leopold and put Drew on the throne. And I have to think that he's going to find other Werewolves eventually- maybe not in the country of Lyssia. But maybe in another country- there have to be more around them, if they have an army. And Wergar the Wolf has to have been fighting somebody on these campaigns he reportedly led his men on all the time.
I'm wondering if Whitley is ever going to become a full therianthrope like her brother and her father the Duke. She almost certainly has the Bear within her, like they do, but she's never mentioned it or used it.

Free Choice/Fantasy: Rise Of The Wolf 3

Well, that was a lot better than I expected. It's a miracle, Bob the Builder creator guy can actually write! I still find that so ironic. I mean, look at the cover.

Does this look like the kind of book created by someone who writes television shows aimed at toddlers?
Anyway, I think Drew is going to make a fantastic king. After all, don't they always say that those who are best suited for power are those who don't want it? I think Drew will spend some time fighting against taking the crown, and there will be some challenges. After all, he's just a teenage boy, and people might want someone more charismatic as king. He also has no way to prove his claim as a legitimate son of Wergar the Wolf, other than his own lycanthropic nature. And Leopold still has the crown inside the castle where he has barricaded himself.
The preview of the next book was pretty intriguing. I would have thought that the young man who escaped was Prince Lucas, if he wasn't already proven to be the kind of spoiled brat who sends someone else with his messages. Could just be a random messenger, but the third person limited viewpoint makes me think that it's somebody we either already know, or will know later, since Jobling was so careful to describe the young man's state of mind as he made his daring escape, his fascination with horses. Or maybe I was right the first time, and there's more to Prince Lucas than meets the eye. Gretchen changed dramatically in the first book- maybe the prince is a bit more independent than he makes himself out to be. 

Free Choice/Fantasy: Rise Of The Wolf 2

Not quite halfway done, but this is as good a place to stop and write as any.
The book's on a higher level than I originally expected it to be. I figured it for an older juvenile kind of thing, but this is definitely young adult.
I'm waiting with bated breath the find out more about how Drew the peasant's son is actually the son of the old dead Werelion king Werger. I did figure, ever since the very beginning when the author described how very different the 'twins' Drew and Trent were, that Drew didn't actually belong to the family. But a lost prince of some kind was definitely not where I thought this was going.
On a side note, while writing this I had to look up whether it was correctly baited or bated breath, and discovered this neat little poem, entitled Cruel Clever Cat, making a joke out of the wrong but very common use of baited:

Sally, having swallowed cheese,
Directs down holes the scented breeze,
Enticing thus with baited breath
Nice mice to an untimely death. 

Bloody, but somehow funny at the same time. Odd how that works, isn't it?

Will Drew have to leave Hector behind? That seems likely at this point, but it would be very much in Hector's nature for him to insist on coming along with Drew to wherever it is he's going to end up, since Hector now has to going into hiding, or more like self-imposed exile anyway- his family's safety depends on the king believing that Hector was killed in the ambush.

Free Choice/Fantasy: Rise Of The Wolf 1

Discovered this series when the youth librarian handed out buttons for it from an author event at a bookstore she went to. They were pretty cool buttons, so I figured I might as well give the books a try. I'm also curious because the author is the same guy who created Bob The Builder, and now here he is writing a teen book series, and I'm just kind of wondering whether he's actually any good at it. The first chapter preview I read online seems to suggest that it might be a little young, but it's hard to tell for sure, so I guess we'll see.

Free Choice/Sci-fi: The 100 3

What can I say? Well, I really hope there's a sequel coming, because that ending was pretty abrupt. It feels like it was supposed to be two books, or even three, and the author was, like, required by contract or something chopped it into equal pieces and set different publication dates for each chunk. A cliffhanger is one thing, but ending it right in the middle of a big old surprise fight scene? So totally not cool.
Obviously, Bellamy and Olivia have to come back eventually, or their story has to join up again somehow with the main group. I was pretty surprised when a bunch of people started backing up Graham's bid for the two of them to get the death penalty. He doesn't seem like much of a leader. He's more the kind of guy who people follow when the going's easy, because he makes grand promises and acts tough and picks on the people who are already disliked to make himself feel stronger and gain public opinion. But when it gets tough, this kind of character usually finds him or occasionally herself at a loss, because they don't actually know how to lead and organize, just how to bully others into doing the work. When there's no one left to delegate to, and everyone's looking at them, the Grahams of the world suddenly realize that -oops!- the person they've been degrading the entire time is the one they actually need. But Graham seems to be holding on so far, probably through the fear of the other kids. They see him as the best chance for survival at the moment, so they back him even if they privately think he's gone crazy.

Free Choice/Sci-fi: The 100 2

So far, this is feeling just a bit mindless. There's been no real action since Bellamy's little shootout, apart from him kissing Clarke right before I stopped. I feel like the stage has been set for the next act, and now everyone is just hanging in limbo, waiting for the curtain to rise again. I'm hoping there's something a little bit more exciting right around the corner. I really hope Wells doesn't get angry with Clarke over this. Sad, yes. But he's already more or less acknowledged that he did something that pretty much gives her every right to hate his guts for life, so he has no right to get all jealous and mad at her and Bellamy when she moves on. That is not the scene I want. I'm looking more for something like a wild animal attack, something that forces everyone, maybe including Graham, to start to look to Wells for leadership and survival. After all, he and Bellamy seem to know the most about how to actually survive this little penal trip to potential pardons and most probably death by radiation.
Come to think of it, it might be nice to see the two of them start working together. Sort of a pact, like between Ren and Shay in Bloodrose, when they were tied up in the boat together and they decided to let Calla choose between them at the end, rather than continue the (immature) constant fighting between themselves over her. Even though she didn't have to choose, because the ending was a total cop-out by the author. But that's not important. 

Free Choice/Sci-fi: The 100 1

So I'm not really sure about this one. It hasn't been on my Amazon list for all that long, which is usually how I find out more about books. I cruise the list, see what's on there, make a couple of attempts to get it online or at the library over months or years and accumulate information in the process. What I do know is that it sounds like a kind of cross between the typical YA adventure and Ender's Game meets Wall-E type sci-fi. 100 juvenile delinquents are sent to recolonize Earth after it was abandoned. From the summary style, the book will probably switch perspectives, maybe in first person, maybe in third, between several of the adventurers, including one who managed to sneak back onto the ship before being sent to Earth. I'm wondering what kind of nasty secrets she'll uncover- after all, the fugitive can sometimes get top-secret information because no one expects them to be where they are.Is it going to be one of those (again, Wall-E) plot lines where they all went into space purely because a company persuaded them to do so? Or was it some collective decision of society? And how could they trust the delinquents to report truthfully and complete their mission? Hard to tell, but we shall see.

Free Choice/Branching Out: Schindler's List 3

Mmmmm. This was in a very different vein from everything else I read for this project. For one thing, as previously mentioned, the subject matter was a lot heavier than everything else I've picked up.
I think it would be very interesting to watch the movie and be able to compare it with the book. I already know that the girl in the red outfit played different roles in the two versions of the story, although she was a strong crystallizing factor for Oskar Schindler in both mediums. In the book, the shock was the juxtaposition of the toddler in the red coat, and the SS officer's paternal guiding hand keeping her at the end of the line, against the horrific murders taking place at the other end of the street, and the realization that no one cared if she saw these crimes taking place because they did not intend to leave her alive to tell anyone about the atrocity she had witnessed in any case.
In Steven Spielberg's movie version, from what bits and pieces I know of the plot, Oskar Schindler sees the little girl waiting at the train station to be loaded into the cattle cars, and notices her in particular because of her bright red coat, which stands out to the audience because it is the only color in the film. Then later, Schindler finds the little girl in a pile of bodies to be disposed of, presumably by burning, and recognizes the coat, and this is his motivation to save as many people as possible.

Free Choice/Branching Out: Schindler's List 2

I feel really weird saying that I'm enjoying this story. After all, it is a book set in the middle of the Holocaust and World War II. Enjoy sounds too- happy and lighthearted, trivializing the whole thing, like it's a work of fiction, something that never actually happened. I guess the best way to say it is that I'm invested in the story and the characters. I'm wondering, now, how much of the movie plot was created around the list, because I know that in the movie the 'red toddler' wound up dead in a pile of bodies waiting to be disposed of, and that's the moment that propels Oskar Schindler to act. In the book, though, the girl in the red coat is so far alive, and although seeing her in the place and time he did was certainly a clarifying moment for Oskar, he already seems to be working to protect the Jews working in his factory, and spending enormous amounts of money to do it. He's quietly transferring people in danger to the subcamp he has basically provided all the funds and materials to build, he secretly gave the Rabbi a bottle of wine for use in his Shabbat rites. He's also feeding the prisoners a lot more than most in the main camp are getting, for the most part out of his own pocket, and bribing officials with massive amounts of cash, wine and enamelware from his factory whenever someone gets into trouble and needs help. I have to wonder whether the girl is still going to die, or whether there will be another event that propels Schindler to do even more for his cause.

Free Choice/Branching Out: Schindler's List 1

I think this counts as outside my comfort zone. It is nonfiction, so it probably counts. I hope it does, since I can't think of anything else nonfiction that I might enjoy off the top of my head, and anything outside my comfort zone is probably going to be nonfiction. I think this is going to be even heavier than hidden, since hidden was realistic fiction and this is actually something that human beings did to each other. I'm wondering if I can get my hands on the movie after I'm done with reading the book. It'll have to be on a night when my mom's at work, though, since she won't watch it. Come to think of it, it's probably not really appropriate for a seventh grader, either, which restricts me to after my sister goes to bed. Movies in half-hour increments- not my favorite way to watch. Oh well.

Free Choice/Sci-fi: Love Minus Eighty 3

Oh, wow. What an ending. So to sum up, Lorelei has maybe-for-real maybe-for-ratings broken up with her life director drama-creation boyfriend and wants Veronica's help getting him back. Winter got revived, but she didn't break Rob's heart because she started having an affair with him, they got caught by her old rich jerk husband/owner and his family who was going to have her sent to debt camp, and she jumped off his private floating island into the water, where Rob picked her up in a rowboat and they're now rowing/walking to Montana to live with Winter's Raw Lifer brother so they won't get arrested. Nathan is still broken-hearted over Lorelei screwing him over when she broke up with him in front of a couple thousand 'screens' to boost her number of viewers. Lycan is definitely interested in Veronica, since he decorated his entire apartment to look just like her favorite romantic interactive and dressed up like the hot virtual guy from the game (that Nathan caught her kissing at the beginning, so obviously she finds this fake man attractive). And when he called her after she left his place, she said she felt warm inside, which was the sign she was looking for that she might love him, so I'm guessing she likes Lycan, too.
Come to think of it, I'm not sure that made all that much sense. You kind of have to just read it to actually get it.
But it was a really good book. Made some interesting points about big business and privacy, too. 

Free Choice/Sci-fi: Love Minus Eighty 2

For a YA novel, this is getting pretty complicated plot-wise. All the secrets and interconnected friendships... wow. Rob loves Winter, obviously. Or not so much; does he love her as the person she is, or the girl who needs saving? He won't be able to know unless she is revived, in which case it becomes a moot point because she'll be married to some rich old possible pervert, and if she does love him, they'll both be miserable because she'll be legally attached to her new husband. What a mess.
And then there's Veronica's tangled mess. Sometimes I think she's falling for Nathan, who she spends all that time with despite insisting he's too arrogant for her. Then there's Rob, who she seems to admire an awful lot for a single guy who's just a friend. Except he loves Winter, which is a whole different set of problems as previously discussed. So is he going to break Veronica's heart? And, as far as I can tell, Lycan is probably going to fall in love with Veronica, given that she renewed his enthusiasm for life after his sort-of-failed sort-of-successful suicide off the Lemiux bridge. Long story. She doesn't seem to feel much for him, though, so far, besides guilt that she tried to stop him from jumping and he did it anyway. Maybe if he makes his intentions clear, she'll start to return his love. Tough to tell; she is, after all, the still-single dating coach who sits alone in her apartment kissing virtual interactive men because, as she says, she has "high standards."

Free Choice/Sci-fi: Love Minus Eighty 1

Scary thing is, I read a preview of this and I kind of see us heading in this direction, where social media overshadows relationships and daily life. Friends who say they didn't do their work or were up until 3 in the morning on Facebook, Twitter or Skype. My YouTube-obsessed sister who constantly quotes the people whose channels she follows and babbles for a half hour about her favorite web shows and exceedingly stupid and/or violent episodes of said YouTube shows. Desmond the Moon Bear and Carl the Llama in particular drive me up the wall. Breaking up with your boyfriend to get viewers actually doesn't look too extreme from where we are now, and I have to say, that worries me a little bit. About society, not my sister. Although she's a little scary too, come to think of it.

Free Choice: Personal Effects 3

Done, and dragging this out because I have nothing to do afterwards. I was impressed by the minimal way the issues discussed intruded on the flow and rhythm of the adventure story. The Don't Ask Don't Tell policy is a pretty ambitious subject to tackle  for a YA novel, but it fit completely naturally into Matt's cross-country journey through his and his brother's souls. I found it really sweet that Curtis was willing to sit down and talk with Matt about his and T.J's time together, their big dreams for the future, their favorite spots to hang out. I think Matt was better able to accept the new reality being presented to him through his brother's belongings when Curtis helped him realize that, even though he planned to leave Matt and Dad for good when he came home, he would have been happy in his new life.
The ending scenes almost confirmed my earlier ideas about T.J lying when he told Matt he chose the military as his career path. Curtis said that T.J knew he was gay all his life, making it even more unlikely that he would have voluntarily enlisted, with the armed forces under Don't Ask Don't Tell. It made his life a thousand times more complicated and risky. I look at Dad and can only think that T.J was desperate to get away from an abusive and grief-stricken house that had never been home.
I almost laughed when Shauna and Matt were trying to talk on the phone about the night he came over to her house. Their mutual complete misinterpretation of the other's behavior was pretty amusing. She wears revealing clothing because she wants him to like her, and is disappointed when he doesn't seem interested; he desperately tries to hide how attracted to her he is, sure that she dressed up for another guy and just wants be friends. Swing and a miss on both ends. Whoops.

Free Choice: Personal Effects 2

Oh, boy. This seems like an assumption that could go really, really wrong. Admittedly, given the mushy letters, it seems reasonable to assume that Celia is T.J's girlfriend, and Zoe is their kid. And maybe they are. It just seems like something you should ask about before you assume.
Anyway, I wonder if T.J was telling the truth, in the beginning, when he tells Matt that he only fought against enlisting because he didn't want their dad to think that he had won. After all, he praises Matt's strength in surviving their father's company all alone while T.J is gone on deployment.

"...But you, you're already smarter than me. And stronger, in your way-you've weathered Dad all by yourself."

And even before that, he sounds like he's trying to convince himself he did the right thing.

"I chose to go. I talked about it with Dad. I met with the recruiter and decided on my specialization. Me. I chose it."


That sounds an awful lot like someone trying to make himself believe he picked this for him instead of Crazy Military Dad. And Matt talks about T.J and Dad fighting, yelling, slamming doors. T.J refusing to eat breakfast with them, stomping out to the car. That sounds like a pretty hardcore rebellion for someone just trying to make a point. After all, he spent all that time hiking with Matt- I find it hard to see him wanting to leave his little brother after that kind of bonding. He loved music, we know that from the description of his room- maybe he secretly wanted to have a career in that vein.

Free Choice: Personal Effects 1

I chose this because the protagonist,  Matt, has to decide whether to serve in the military after his 'in the closet' brother's death in Iraq, something we've been discussing in my Sunday School class in terms of conscientious objection. I'm curious to see how the author juggles the multiple heavy issues this book attempts to tackle- will it be a message poorly disguised as a story, or a story that happens to have a message? I'm inclined to think the latter, since the idea of Matt running away from home to deliver his brother's last unsent letter hints at more of an adventure story than a purely moral struggle.

Free Choice/YA Sci-fi: The Dark Shore 3

I think this is one of those cases of not minding the main characters dying, since they were pretty good deaths. I hate it when killing off characters becomes a cop-out because the author's written themselves into a corner and this is the easy way out. But Leech and Seven's demises were sort of in the cards for a while. It was just a matter of when. After all, Leech was already hurt, and Paul had been trying to kill him all the way through the book. It still surprised me, though. I didn't think they'd be able to continue on without Leech. But then, Owen seems to have some mysterious ability to hook into the others' abilities and skulls. More on that in the next book? Time will tell.
I was right about Lily getting jealous of Seven- Chloe? I was kind of expecting her to be gone for good when she told Owen she was leaving. But her showing up again in the middle of the big fight scene, announcing that she was the real Medium? Wow! Big shocker. Seven seemed pretty sure that she was the goddess/Atlantean savior who completed the trio. I think I had a little inkling of her death, though, when she took the drugs on the beach with Owen. The scene started to reveal just how out of control she really was, behind the adoring goddess facade Victoria built around her.
Speaking of Victoria, I wonder what she was going to do if her little plan to kill the Atlanteans failed, and Paul had a secret backup plan to find the Paintbrush. He seems like the type to have prepared something in the event that something happens to Owen and the gang en route.

Free Choice/YA Sci-fi: The Dark Shore 2

Now I'm really curious! Is Leech going to be able to see well enough to navigate them to the Paintbrush Of The Gods? He doesn't seem to be in such great shape anyway, what with the cryo sickness thing. I'm absolutely dying to know why Owen's mother has suddenly made a reappearance after walking out on him. Is she going to go with them on the trip? That could be seriously awkward. And I don't trust Victoria at all. Her world outlook is a little too much leaning to the side of twisted and manipulative for me to believe she could ever really have anyone else's best interests at heart, especially the Three from the Atlantean Epic legends that keep her in power and her people happy. Or maybe I'm reading her wrong, and she's just as practical as she has to be to survive in this post global warming world, where the weak don't last long without the money to pay for coddling. She did make a fairly convincing argument for the girl's sacrifice- she wanted to die, there were no drugs or medical treatment available, and it kept the citizens of the city satisfied that the gods were being placated. However, Seven's opinions about her methods and motivations are definitely food for thought, and should be taken into consideration.
Despite the attitude, I find myself liking Seven's personality. Tough, snarky, and a born survivor, no matter what her ultimate goals turn out to be- and I'm still not sure whether she's out from under Victoria's thumb.

Free Choice/YA Sci-fi: The Dark Shore 1

Can't wait for this one! I read the first book in the series, and it was absolutely incredible! A great adventure. Owen was a great protagonist-his thoughts and feelings felt very based in reality, like a modern teenager, rather than someone 'aged by experience'. That would have made it feel much too fake. We're still getting to know Leech- he was the antagonist, almost literally, for most of the first book. But he started to show a bit of a softer side right at the end as they made their escape, so there might still be hope for him to redeem himself on the trip. I'm bursting to know who the third Atlantean is. If it's a girl, will Lily resent her for being the right one and having the connection with Owen that Lily can never share? Will whoever it is believe them, and want to come with them on their quest?

Free Choice: God Is in The Pancakes 3

Oh my goodness. That was definitely not was I was expecting. But what a great ending! Leaves you hanging- did Izzy 'kill' Mr. Sands, or did Grace?
The book really raised some questions in my mind. Why didn't Mr. Sands have a legal document stating he didn't want to be on life support, instead of asking his wife to end his life, then asking Grace when she refused? Should the hospital have asked his wife about his wishes beforehand? Is what Grace and Izzy did criminal? If caught, they could conceivably be called murderers and be tried, convicted and sent to prison. But was it really taking a life, if Mr. Sands was ready to die?

Some people will probably be mad at me for saying this, but in this specific instance, I think that both women did the right thing. Mr. Sands' quality of life was extremely poor and continuing to decline. He was ready to go, and probably should have been in hospice care, at least at the end of the book.
I found it really creative how the bubbles in the pancakes Grace made mirrored the ups and downs of her mood and helped tell her story.When she was happy, they were light and joyful; when she was going through tough times, she said,


....I get the strangest feeling that the bubbles won't rise to the surface today. It almost seems like the atmosphere here's too heavy to support them, as if their lightness would be offensive.
But then all of a sudden and out of nowhere, one bubbles up.
And then another.
And then four more bubbles cluster at the edge of one of the pancakes. As each bursts into the world, unaffected by anything that's come before or will happen after, the bubbles take their privileged moments in time.


 Even when bad things happen, life goes on. The world keeps turning.

Free Choice: God Is in The Pancakes 2

Great choice of what to read first! I'm really enjoying this so far. I'm very interested in the way Grace unconsciously tries to connect with her father through prayer. As we discussed with Mr.McDaniels, religion can be a way of comforting yourself by putting tough decisions in the hands of a higher power. Grace is avoiding making a choice by asking God for a miracle cure. She's starting to get frustrated that her wish is not being granted, until she meets the strange man in the chapel the day she cuts school. 

  

"Can I ask you a question?" I say suddenly.

“Oh." He blinks. “Sure."

‘I mean, if this is too personal, just tell me to shut up or whatever “

He laughs a little. “Now you’ve got my attention."

“Do you think this works?” I motion to the pews, the altar. When he doesn’t answer right away, I figure I need to be more specific. “The praying. I mean, do you really think anyone’s listening?”

“Yes,” he says, nodding his head “But I suppose that’s going to be the answer you get from most people you’d find in a church.”

"Dumb question, I know "

“No, no, I didn’t mean that. I just meant that that’s probably just the knee-jerk reaction you’d get from most people. People don’t really like to think about it because it’s more reassuring to them to have a definite answer. Having an answer is a comfort. It’s when you start asking questions and those questions pull threads in the larger fabric, you’re forced to wonder what you’re left with. And for people of any age, it’s scary to think the fabric of the universe—or the universe as you’ve always believed it existed—can just unwind, you know?”

“Yep.” I start thinking of all the “absolutes” that used to exist for me. I realize my head is tilting to the side as I try to figure out if he just told me he believed in prayer because it’s easier to believe that or because he really really believes it does work. ”So do you think someone hears us or is listening when we pray?”

He smiles and I can see both the top and bottom rows of his teeth. “I’ve had moments of doubt. Of course I have. I don’t know how anyone can live in this world where, let’s face it, injustice takes place all the time, and not wonder if anyone‘s paving attention.” He shrugs “But what I keep coming

back to is the fact that life is so fragile, someone has to be looking out for us. At least in the most basic way. So for me, prayer is not just the asking of a favor—like ‘please God, let my mother be okay’—but as more of a thank you. A thank you for every minute I’ve had with her. I’m sure that kind of sounds corny, but it does help me appreciate the good things in my life. So when I say yeah, prayer works, it’s because I think that if all I’m doing here is expressing gratitude for her life, that‘s okay. That’s important."

This is the moment when Grace starts thinking seriously again about what Mr. Sands asked her to do, because she realizes that God doesn't do magic. Mr. Sands is not going to suddenly get better. The question is whether she feels that God is telling her to honor his request. 

Free Choice: God Is in The Pancakes 1

Of the next three of my chosen books, this is probably the one I'm anticipating the most. It seems almost like a crossover between YA and Adult reading- assisted death is a pretty heavy topic for a book aimed at teenagers. I've found myself wondering if it might be a little like an older version of a juvenile chapter book I have at home somewhere, Everything On A Waffle, where the teenage protagonist deals with the deaths (supposedly) of her parents with the help of a restaurant owner who serves every dish on the menu on a waffle. It's a really cute story, especially because it turns out that her parents were actually stranded on a desert island, and I still pull it out to reread every now and then.

Free Choice/Beach Read: The Thing About the Truth 3

Great book! I'm definitely going to encourage my sister to pick this up before I take it back to the library. Anybody who enjoyed North Of Beautiful should definitely give this a try.
Overall, a really sweet, tender love story. No big social issues, no background agenda- just a well-written, awesome story.
As soon as Kelsey lied about being a virgin, I knew what they'd been referring to in the aftermath sections the entire time. I mean, how can you possibly think that's not going to backfire? I do think that they did the right thing by spending some time apart, though. They were both upset and angry, and they were only going to say more stupid things and get each other more upset if they tried to talk it out right then. Oh, darn it, I sound like the Guidance Counselor Broken Record Spiel. Anyway, I loved how they both tried to take the blame for what happened at Face It Down Day.It was really sweet that they still cared enough about each other to make the attempt, even though they were fighting and didn't get to really talk through everything until after the superintendent dismisses them from his office. 
Rielle, I can't quite figure out. Is she intentionally cruel, or just too obsessed with her own popularity standing at school to have any real friends? She did flat-out lie when Kelsey called her. Saying she was at her grandmother's house to avoid her (former) friend is the action of someone who is manipulative and cruel. And going to the mall to hang out with her friends right after she pulled off the deception? No conscience at all. She was laughing as if she didn't have a care in the world.

Free Choice/Beach Read: The Thing About the Truth 2

Mmmmm. So I had this pegged about right. Slightly mindless but well-written high school romance novel. At least so far.
The format is pretty intriguing. Not that the flash forward to the aftermath/flash back to the incident format is entirely unique. But I Love Him has a similar plot device. But it is highly effective, giving you just enough bits and pieces of both ends of the story to keep you both hooked and guessing the whole way.
For a minute, I was worried that the whole thing with Isaac kissing Marina was going to be smoothed over way too quickly, all forgiven and forgotten 12 hours later.


...if she had thrown a drink at me, I would have deserved it.
But then, right before she's about to freak out on me, her whole face changes. She's staring at something over my shoulder, and I turn around to see what she's looking at. It's a bunch of girls. A bunch of stuck-up girls. I know it sounds f***ed (asterisks mine) up, but I can tell just by looking at them.


This is the saving grace of the entire scene. I really thought Kelsey was about to yell a little, and then all would be forgiven- and, in Isaac's defense, he was basically incoherent and not really in control of his actions, his choice to drink in the first place notwithstanding. Pilot has left the wheelhouse. But this is the pivotal moment, because it forces Kelsey to admit that she was kicked out, and to tell Isaac her entire story, from the top, in the process finally telling the reader, too.

Free Choice/Beach Read: The Thing About the Truth 1

All I know about this book came from the synopsis and a free preview I read years ago. From what I remember, it's probably a pretty typical teenage romance novel, a basic bad boy with a good heart meets good girl with secret dark past formula, so the twists and turns of the plot are not as much of an issue as the skill and detail used in creating the characters. The preview makes me hopeful that this will be a pretty good read. I'm definitely looking forward to finally finishing this, a goal ever since I read the first chapter on stupid annoying Scribd.

Free Choice/Nonfiction: Picking Cotton 3

Done by the end of A lunchtime- I think I shocked Sun a little. I loved the humor, high spirits and tender moments that Jennifer's voice brought to the table in what was really a pretty sad story, overall. I especially liked the way she described the sonogram when she and her husband learned that she was going to have triplets, when she says, "At this point, I did not want them to do any more scanning. I mean, how many could be in there?"
As I said in the last post, Ron's faith and continued hope and efforts made for a very inspiring story. He was frustrated and tired of fighting, and the whole world seemed against him, especially when an all-white jury was selected to try a black man, something that I'm pretty sure wouldn't be allowed to happen now. I'm surprised that it did happen even then, in 1987. If it was the 50's or 60's, even early 70's, I would have understood a little more how that could occur. And yet, even when his trial was clearly biased towards the raped young white girls accusing him, he kept trying, fighting his way through the legal system to try to make sure that Bobby Poole was identified as the real rapist.
Despite her being the 'villain' of the tale, I found myself really sympathizing with Jennifer. She was not trying to send Ron to jail out of spite, or cruelty; she really, truly believed that this was the guy who had attacked her, especially after the memory expert explained that a series of mistakes by the police showing her the photos and lineup caused Bobby Poole's face in her memory to be replaced with Ronald Cotton's.

Free Choice/Nonfiction: Picking Cotton 2

So far, I'm liking this more than The Color of Water. The story holds my attention better. For one thing, there's a definite goal, a point the story is working towards. I love how even though Ron was sentenced to prison twice, once in the original trial and once when he was charged with the second rape, he never gave up hope that he would get out and the truth would be revealed.


Death or escape were not my only options. I still had a chance at an appeal, and I believed that the Lord had his reasons for me being in this situation. Sometimes, all I had to cling to was the personal knowledge that I was innocent, and even if no one else knew that, God did. It made me feel more connected to him.


Not that I'm trying to make this a religious thing, but religion was a large part of Ronald Cotton's life, and I find it very meaningful that he continued to believe that, even though he was serving a life sentence in prison, he still believed that there was a reason for all of this to happen- that something good would happen through him being here. He says a little later in the chapter, "I knew my innocence would not matter if I gave in to the violence all around me." If he allowed himself to become like the men he was surrounded by, he would be a criminal just like them, and belong in prison, despite having not committed the crime he was actually sentenced for.

Free Choice/Nonfiction: Picking Cotton 1

I know the basic premise of this book. The woman was raped and identified a particular man as the culprit. He insisted he was innocent, but her testimony sent him to prison. Over a decade later, he took a DNA test that proved his claim, and he was released. Eventually, the two met and became friends. I'm definitely interested in this story because it's something that's been in the news on and off in recent years, popping up again every time someone proves their innocence of a crime they went to jail for. I think it's an interesting opportunity to find out more about a little-known story. 

Free Choice/Beach Read: Kindness for Weakness 3

Done with my assigned categories- free choice the rest of the way, smooth sailing ahead! This was definitely not a great story. It was okay, and I kind of enjoyed it. But it's not as good as a lot of other YA I've read lately. hidden was emotionally deeper, delving into Ahmed's thoughts and soul and really showcasing the first person narrative in a way that Kindness For Weakness just can't seem to. A Matter Of Days had a much more beautifully built setting, nailing the horror and ruin of a post-pandemic world full of rotting corpses- world building, A+! Exposure carried the tension better. While smaller threads cleared up gradually as the Virals worked their way through the multitude of mysteries, others opened up, keeping me hanging on every word and eagerly anticipating the next installment. Kindness For Weakness was simply... unimpressive. James, Louis, and the entire message of the book were wishy-washy, inconsistent, and less than gripping.
The book floats in the no-man's-land between good enough to enjoy and bad enough to dislike. There were opportunities for redemption; the juvenile detention center could have been a really well-done setting, had the author put more emphasis on the grimness of the place.
The shuffling of the boys from unit to unit felt like a very cheap plot trick. Fight about to happen in the next few pages? Suddenly, one of the conflicting characters has temporarily vanished, only to reappear when the tension resolves itself.
And the end? The scene where a dying James gets glimpses of the future seems like a poor way to slip those details into the story.
All in all, not something I'd pick up again.

Free Choice/Beach Read: Kindness for Weakness 2

I'm wondering what the eventual point here is going to be. Will James be stronger if he doesn't fight back and resists peer pressure, or if he fights back against the bully? From the references to The Sea Wolf, I'm actually beginning to think the latter may be the case. I'm not sure, though, because so far the author's message seems mixed. I definitely don't hate the book enough to put it down- that ultimate disgrace is reserved for Jane Eyre (cue horrified shudder). But so far, the story is so-so. The conflicts are short, blunt, and quickly resolved. James is a pretty good narrator, and his friendship with Freddie could definitely create some interesting moments should the plot pick up. I sincerely hope that this isn't heading towards Louis walking in and tearfully confessing his crimes, thereby saving his much-loved little brother from this awful, undeserved fate, followed by a tragic makeup scene where they graciously forgive each other for past mistakes- can you say cheesy? But it hasn't happened up to now, so there's hope yet for James to figure himself out and quit hesitating over everything. I mean, come on! Quit painstakingly deliberating everything and 'bemoaning your sad and sorry fate' (Dealing With Dragons, pg. 63) and get on with things. Yes, it sucks, but you're in juvie now, so do something about it! Tell on your no-good, jerky brother, or something! The guy kind of deserves it, really. He's been stringing James along for years, and now he ran away, leaving his little brother to face the juvenile justice system because Louis conned him into delivering drugs after his partner got arrested.

Free Choice/Beach Read: Kindness for Weakness 1

I picked this book the way I do most of them, solely based on the synopsis, which gave no details at all. So I know next to nothing about the nuances of the plot. All I know is that it involves a semi-innocent kid who gets sent to juvie. There does seem to be an underlying message about the effectiveness of the juvenile system, which I gleaned from the editorial review on the Amazon page. I did have it recommended to me by Amazon though, and they are scary good. As in, I just finished a book, didn't put anything about it online, and the sequel I didn't know existed is popping up good. Except for the times when I add a vampire novel so it suggests I buy a Hello Kitty alarm clock and power tools or something. I guess every computer system has its limits.

Free Choice: hidden 3

All done! I got through this a lot quicker than I did Dune- even though the subject was heavier, Dune is far more dense, with the multitude of intertwining subplots. hidden was in some ways easier to follow, and in some ways harder, especially in the beginning, when Ahmed is drugged. And all through the book, his mental state is confused and a bit disjointed.

I press Pause. My arm's wet. I look up. It's sprinkling. The gray skies gone black. Rain's on the way.
Crack!
Lightning. The sky blinks. The man's face flashes on the clouds.
Crack! Lightning. The switchblade catches the light.
Crack! Lightning. Quick, Bob slices the boy's throat.
"No!" I shut my eyes, shake my head. Maybe that will erase the image from my mind's eye. I wonder. Are Bathroom Bob and Burger Bob the same Bob?
I press Play.

But it doesn't bother me much; just like the reader finds this kind of writing hard to follow, Ahmed is struggling to understand himself. It reminds me strongly of an Animorphs book I picked up once, many years ago. The writing for the series was usually clear and easy to read. In this one, though, the person who is telling the story is having her perceptions altered, so that she doesn't know what is real and what is false, bounced around like a yo-yo from one possible hallucination to another and back. It was tougher going for that reason, but I felt like I really understood the character's emotional state, just like with Ahmed.

Free Choice: hidden 2

All right, so I'm close the end but not there yet. I'm very interested to see what happens to Ahmed at the end. Because it feels to me like Ahmed has sort of been panicking inside while Ben hovers in limbo in this safe house. Will he stay, leave, get returned to his RTC?

"Geez." He shakes his head, "acting" like he's remembering. Or, trying to. Now it's so obvious he's lying. There was no Valerie, and if he'd been there, he'd know. "Valerie, Valerie, Valerie. Dunno. Musta been after my time."


To me, this doesn't look like obvious lying. I mean, how's J.D going to know that Valerie didn't get to Serenity Ridge after he left? He can't remember someone who didn't exist. Solid proof? Not quite. I wonder if this is Ahmed trying to convince himself that J.D is lying so that he'll have a reason to dislike him. A reason not to fall in love, because he believes he's got a crush on Hammer. Whose character I love, by the way. The perfect example of what happens to desperate people rejected by society at large- making porn video shows for some kind of steady income while hiding away from the people who wouldn't accept him. Of course, he's not the sharpest tool in the shed, from the sounds of it. But maybe that's just as much a part of his act as his teasing and taunting online- the vapid disguise for his inner turmoil. I'd love to see a sequel from Hammer's perspective, although that might be even more graphic in nature, given his livelihood and what little we find out about his early life. 

Free Choice: hidden 1

I read a free preview of the first few chapters of this, and I can see why it's an adult book and not YA. There's definitely some language and content issues. But I'm very interested so far. The author sort of throws you right into the action without much explanation- it's a 'read between the lines' sort of book, from what I can tell. I've been trying to get through all my other books just to get to this one. It's like, torture having it sitting in the house and not reading it until Dune was finished. From the synopsis and first few chapters, I think that this is going to be very different from the other 'residential treatment center for homosexuality' book I've read, The Miseducation of Cameron Post. I think this will be a lot more graphic, more of the darker side of the issue. In Cameron Post, there was a lot of anxiety and psychological talk, but no real abuse. I already know hidden (no capital, in case you're wondering) will include some more disturbing elements, from the first chapter I previewed.

Classic: Dune 3

Finished! Great book, now I'm going to have to read the rest of the series. I do wonder if the next book will be about Paul, or any future children Paul might have had with his new bride, Princess Irulan. It is very interesting that she was the one who wrote most of the chronicles of Paul's life that were quoted from throughout the book. I have to think that this will become important later. I'm also curious as to whether Jessica's prediction about Paul loving Chani and never Irulan will come true.

"Think on it, Chani: that princess will have the name, yet she'll live as less than a concubine-never to know a moment of tenderness from the man to whom she's bound. While we, Chani, we who carry the name of concubine-history will call us wives."


What a great way to end a book. For what amounts to almost a tragedy, the last few words feel warm and certain and real.- definitely on my top ten list of favorites. So sweet! It really speaks to Jessica's enduring love of her dead Duke that she still considers herself his wife, even though he is gone without their ever having married. It also gently reminds Chani that title in the present matters very little, that although Irulan is the official wife, Chani is the one who is truly loved, which makes up for all the titles in the world. What makes a wife is not a wedding ring, but the care and attention of the man with whom she lives.

Classic: Dune 2

About halfway through the book, and time for the midway review. I think a summary of the story up to this point is in order.

The book is about a futuristic society living on imaginary planets. A royal family has been 'given' a desert planet as their fiefdom, as part of a larger, much more complicated plan to kill them all which we need not go into. Their enemies turned one of their most trusted household members into a traitor and attacked the stronghold. The Duke was captured alive, but attempted and failed to kill his captor with a poison capsule tooth, which we need not go into. So he's dead, and his concubine and son, now the Duke because he's the only one left, are in the desert sheltering from the people hunting them among a group of native people, who are being slowly hunted down and killed because they can defeat the Emperor's elite soldiers. And that's pretty much where things stand at this point.

 I'm very interested in what is slowly being revealed about the sandworms- the implication is that the Fremen natives secretly ride them around, and they have something to do with the formation of the spice. For one thing, the worm that Paul and Jessica escaped smelled strongly of spice.

Cinnamon!
The smell of it flooded across him.
What has a worm to do with the spice, melange? he asked himself. And then he remembered Liet-Kynes betraying a veiled reference to some association between worm and spice.


For another thing, when Kynes was crawling across the desert, he thought that the pre-spice under the ground would attract a worm- a 'maker', he called it. As in maker of the melange?

I suppose we shall see.

I'm finding that, in its plot complexities, this book is a bit similar to the other adult science fiction I've read- mainly The Cuckoo's Egg and Serpent's Reach. There are a whole bunch of undercurrents woven together into the plot, complexities that have to be teased out from between the lines. There are parts of Serpent's Reach that I still don't quite understand after reading it five times. Great story, by the way.

Classic: Dune 1

I have been staring at this series on my dad's bookshelf for years, wondering if the first one was floating around somewhere for me to read. This project provided me with the motivation to actually go hunt it down. I don't really know a lot about it. I'm aware that it's classic sci-fi, and involves giant Sandworms on a fictional, futuristic planet. I also read a quote from it in one of my favorite books, Fear by Michael Grant. “I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.” 

I love that quote, and not just because it occurs at one of my favorite points in Fear. It seems like such a cool way to live your life. 

Nonfiction: The Color of Water 3

Finished the last, oh, 20 pages. Oh well. Better luck next time.
I did like this book, but I didn't love it. Part of that was that I really wanted to get through it so I could start reading Dune. But I think most of it's just that the story was more low-key than I generally enjoy. There was no real climax; there were ups and downs, but it just kind of petered out. The end, though, was really sweet, how they went back in time a little and showed the author's father and mother as young people trying to start a church for their community, and then skipped forward to when the mom was old and living in another state, but came back to visit the church and its new pastor. It really sort of embodies the idea of community spirit, how a place can become a part of you, and vice versa. I was interested to look in the back and see that many of the siblings live and work in our area. Not that I'm going to try and seek them out or anything, that would just be too weird and way overdoing the whole thing. It's just a cool little piece of local history. I always get a little thrill when I see that an author or a character lives close to us. Marley and Me, for one. And Laurie Halse Anderson actually lived in Ambler for a while, and set a whole series of children's books here, which I eagerly devoured as a fourth grader upon discovering them. These days, she's living in northern New York, and her YA stuff like Forge and Speak is more my speed, but it's still so cool!



Soon, I'm hoping to add to this post with information from a family friend who actually knew the author's mother.

Nonfiction: The Color of Water 2

Forgot to stop until I was near the end of the book. Not quite there yet, though, so I'll give it a shot. I'm enjoying this book more than I originally thought I would. It's very interesting to look at racism from a point of view that is not really aware of civil rights and nonviolence, but identified more with the black power and liberation movement and grew up hearing about Malcolm X and 'the revolution'. The author grew up in a neighborhood where the liberation colors were often painted on nearby trees and public monuments, in a time when the younger generation wanted to rise up and rebel. In fact, Helen, the second-oldest sister of the twelve kids "became a complete hippie before our astonished eyes, dressing in beads and berets and wearing sweet-smelling oils that, she said, gave you certain powers. A folk guitar player named Eric Bibb followed her everywhere...She sat up late at night with my elder siblings and talked about the revolution against the white man...My little sister Kathy and I would creep to the top of the stairs... as the Big Kids had animated conversations about 'changing the system' and 'the revolution'..."You have to fight the system!" she'd yell. "Fight the Man!"
The other kids were eventually inspired by Helen's rebellion, and one by one, began to sow their own wild oats, especially when their mother lost control of the household after the death of their stepfather. The author admits to spending a period of his life hooked on pot, running wild in the streets, during this time.

Nonfiction: The Color of Water 1

I know pretty much nothing about this book except that it is about a mixed-race family and a black man who grew up with a white mother. I'm finding it hard to predict anything, not knowing anything about it, but I guess it will probably deal with racism and maybe some violence. It probably takes place in the North, since Southern Jim Crow laws banned interracial marriage. I'm curious as to whether the parents' marriage lasted, or if they divorced or separated because of prejudice around them- the dad was almost certainly black, if the kids are and the mother's white. I wonder if there were some siblings with light skin, and if that caused tension in the household.

Fiction: Brave New World 3

Finished the book. The ending was way more disturbing than I was really expecting. I mean, I kind of expected John to go back to the reservation- maybe lead a revolt? Hanging himself was not on my radar.I did find it very interesting that, when John was touring the school, one of the lessons he saw was about his own people.
""But why do they laugh?" asked the Savage in a pained bewilderment.
"Why?" The Provost turned towards him a still broadly grinning face. "Why? But because it's so extraordinarily funny.""

These people have so few concepts of difference that another culture must obviously be so stupid as to be laughable. Because of their conditioning, they cannot even explain why they feel a certain way. If pressed, they most likely could not say what about this scene is amusing; they laugh simply because it is, for some reason, funny.

This was a pretty good read. It's an interesting commentary on the state of the human race, and, ironically, becoming more relevant through the years as genetic engineering improves. As we discussed in bio the other day, our generation's children may be genetically altered in utero, somewhat like what takes place in this book; although in class we were talking about it as a means of correcting genetic defects, not conditioning certain people to be smarter or more resistant to chemicals. I definitely found the book thought-provoking- as, of course, it was intended to be. Not the most amazing piece of literature ever written, but the story is meant to be second to the message behind it, and in that sense, the author achieved his purpose. 

Fiction: Brave New World 2

Part way through the book, I'm still unsure as to where this is going. Bernard is obviously a central character, which I didn't expect. I'm sure it was deadly serious when it was written, but in a modern light the whole thing reads almost like a parody of an apocalyptic novel. It's like it was meant to be fantasy/sci-fi, but it's slowly turning into realistic fiction. Obviously, genetic manipulation wouldn't happen exactly like the book portrays it, but we're definitely getting there.
I think Bernard definitely is becoming the central focus here. What I found more interesting, though, were the small details of the world that Huxley is building. The Semi-moron, and the Savage reservation, and the death conditioning. Especially that. How they refer to death as "a matter of course... like any other physiological process." The author is driving home how little personal attachments matter. Dying is a bodily function, like breathing or sleeping, and the loss of a life matters startlingly little.
 I'm not 100 percent sure about the significance of the Semi-moron, but I did find it meaningful when the one operating the escalator said, "Oh, roof!" in a 'voice of rapture' and then 'dropped back into the droning twilight of the well, the twilight of his own habitual stupor.' It represents the twilight of the world's existence, pierced by occasional sanctioned rays of light- neither light nor dark, hovering forever in the middle. The people are so unknowingly deprived that they are profoundly grateful for any tiny little blessing.

Fiction: Brave New World 1

After we read the first chapter, I find this book just a little... eerie? I mean, when it was written, it must have seemed like total science fiction, like nothing that could ever possibly happen. And yet here we are, with all the technology and the tools to make it a reality. We have so much confidence in democratically elected government keeping anything remotely like that world from ever happening. Well, the Ukraine had a democratically elected president, too, and look what happened to him.

What genre do you even put this in? Sci-fi turned dystopian through the passage of time? Is there even a clear divide between them? I don't think there is, much. Just two sides of the same coin.

 I know that this book is one of the ones that always shows up for banned book month.Why I'm not sure, unless it's (gasp) the references to sex and socialism. I personally have not found it to be very offensive so far, but then, some people are offended by everything.